Holy Exploding Methane, Supercow!

Flatulent cows start fire at German dairy farm - police
"One cow was treated for burns, a police spokesman added."

That's is called medium rare in Texas! I guess that this farmer never herd of the udderly fantastic methane collector depicted here. Yes, this is actually a real contraption for the collection of bovine methane. Looks like this one is ready pop and needs to be changed or vented or whatever. How would, Methane Expeller, sound on your resume? Well, back to our story.

We found our ace reporter, Milky (can you say Twin Pines?),

who was on the scene in a mooo-ment and was fortunate enough to get a nice photo of one of the cows out standing in its field. What a blast! The cow was supposedly named Crepitating Clara by the farmer. Paul Boomer and Lord Windesmear also attested to the unusual cow capabilities as they happened to be in the area after performing in one of the international contests, The Battle at Thunderblow, which is sponsored by Trillblow Records. They were both very interested in the cow's diet and seemed unconcerned with the possible flammable side effects.

Milky was able to interview the farmer, Fanny Flatulence, who seemed very excited to meet us.

She keeps the cows on a strict diet of beans and habanero peppers. She claims that it keeps the cows udders warm in the winter for easier milking. "Don't even think about using this milk to quench that spicy food you just ate!" she laughingly exclaimed. The blast is blamed on the replacement of a defective exhaust gas fan with a new unit that was not explosion-proof.

(I must admit that this was lost to the draft file for a while so it is a bit tardy.)

Fast & Furious

No, not the cars.

Gun from botched 'Fast and Furious' operation turns up after Mexican resort shootout
"Fast and Furious was a 2006-2011 ATF operation in which the agency allowed hundreds of guns to be sold to Mexican drug traffickers in hopes the weapons would lead them to cartel leaders."

Why do news sources, including Fox, repeat the government propaganda? This wasn't a botched sting operation. The intent of tracking guns to the cartel was cover story for the actual intent. There was no path forward to track anything so what do you think the actual reason for the program was? I do not for a minute believe that the agents involved were stupid enough to not realize that the plan was absent a way to capture any bad guys and retrieve the guns.

Many believe that the operation was to develop misinformation leading to the suppression of 2nd Amendment rights. The people that spouted this rational were first labeled a tin hat folks. The tin foil boys are looking pretty sane compared to the government responses.

How were they going to track anything? Follow the trail of dead people? Damned callused way to get out your propaganda. The only agents harassed were the whistle blowers. The ones that kept their mouths shut were moved and promoted. These actions well define that it was authorized from higher up the food chain. Shameful.

Let me fix that headline for you.....
Gun From Government's Exposed Deadly 'Fast and Furious' Propaganda Operation Turns Up After Mexican Resort Shootout.

Color Run

Daughter #1 flew back in to visit for the holidays. While making her plans, she asked if I would go to a 5K color run with her. I replied that would be great but that I would walk not run. My old knees wouldn't like that running stuff. The run was a "fun run" out at the fairgrounds to raise money for the Special Olympics. We had a great time. It did seem odd being at the fairgrounds for something other than a gun show! I am practicing at coming up to speed for the technology available in the 20th century so here is a selfie after the 5K. 

(Yes, I do understand how the century relates to the actual date. It is supposed to be a joke. Laughing would be appropriate now.) The bandanna did not keep all of the powder out of my mouth as I had orange on my teeth. Fun times for a good cause!

Happy New Year!

I would like to wish everyone a happy and prosperous New Year.

Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual. - Mark Twain

Forest Service Declares War on RV & Campers During Hunter Season - Updated

Update

It would appear that there was enough public outcry that the FS decided that they needed to "clarify" their position. Game & Fish believes that the confusion has been resolved.

The letter from Regional Forester Cal Joyner dated November 26 to Arizona Game and Fish Director Larry Voyles regarding AZGFD's concerns

A release by Coconino National Forest Supervisor Earl Stewart and Kaibab National Forest Supervisor Mike Williams on the Forest Service website dated December 9;

A letter dated December 9 from Forest Service Chief Tom Tidwell to Senator John McCain, addressing the senator’s concerns

I can't say that my opinion of the two departments has changed. The FS just got called out on their publication and decided to backtrack.


Original Post

Forest Service Camping - 72 Hour Rule

Warning to Arizona hunters camping on the Coconino, Kaibab and Prescott National Forests

On August 16, 2013, the Coconino National Forest issued a press release entitled “Parking trailers in forests prohibited during hunting season.” The press release is specific to the Coconino, Kaibab, and Prescott National Forests, and is directed exclusively at hunters and recreationists who leave their trailers and/or motor homes unattended on the forest for more than 72 hours. These sportsmen may be subject to enforcement action, including citations or impoundment of vehicles, trailers and/or motor homes. The release specifically states, If trailers are left unattended for more than 72 hours, the Forest Service considers them abandoned property and may remove them from the forest. Violators can also be cited for this action.

See the whole article from AZ Game & Fish, link above, who are very opposed to this tactic along with the Sheriff's Departments.

You know where this is heading since most of the Forest Service is a 9-5 operation. You leave the trailer prior to daybreak to hunt and don't return until after sundown. Do this 3 days running, the FS comes by about midday for three days and then steals your camp claiming is was abandoned. Notice that they included impoundment of vehicles.

This is actually very anti-hunting. It must really chap their hides that some of the people come out a couple of days before season to grab a decent place to put the RV, return to town and then come back to camp for the hunt season. They are still legal within the 14 day limit. I imagine some candy-a**ed people have complained because they did not get there first. I don't have an RV and I could care less if the people with them do this. I have been known to go a couple of days early with my tent to do just the same. I am surprised that the FS hasn't included tents and vehicles the same way. If you are going to be a thief then you might as well go all the way. This has nothing to do with preservation but everything to do with revenue enhancement and restrictive control.

See the AZ G&F site for the contact information of the various FS employees so that you may vent your displeasure. The FS don't want you out there shooting, hunting or any other multiple use activity. They would love to get rid of the ranchers too. Only tree huggers allowed but you have to form a ring without touching the tree as a bit of bark may become dislodged. Don't step on the grass and quit breathing out that CO2!

Perhaps I am just lucky, but I have yet to meet a Game & Fish Officer who was anything but polite. Most have been willing to talk about good places to hunt or what the fish are hitting on. I am not new to this as I have been hunting, hiking, camping, four wheeling and backpacking for almost 50 years (yes, I am getting kind of old) and have met dozens of G&F Officers

On the other hand I am probably unlucky in that I have yet to meet a FS employee who wasn't an unfriendly bureaucrat with inflated opinions of their importance.  I am biased by my experiences and think that the FS has become run by a bunch of tree hugging, anti-ranching, anti-hunting, anti-camping college grads with inflated opinions of themselves and their mission to keep the unwashed masses out of "their" forests.  Feel free to disagree.


                     

Too Warm

It is a little warm for the season right now. But that is just my opinion as I think that it should be a little chilly for Christmas time. Guess I will just have to go get an ice cream cone.

So that is how soft serve is made. Perhaps I will pass on the ice cream!

Merry Christmas!

We are off to the "Hallelujah" service tonight. Our daughters starting calling it this when they were little because there is a lot of singing and a little sermon on Christmas Eve. Daughter #1 is home for college break so we will exchange gifts tomorrow. We already exchanged gifts with Daughter #2 and her Marine before Thanksgiving as he deployed then to Okinawa for the next three years. I would like to wish all a very merry Christmas and may God bless!

Deja Vu Thanksgiving

It was like we had gone back in time to BC. This is what we refer to as "Before Children". Daughter #1 stayed in Texas and daughter #2 along with her Marine are in Okinawa. We decided to go back to our old ways and skip the turkey. Turkey for two has a nice sound to it but results in leftovers forever. There is only so much dark meat and I am no fan of the dry white meat on a turkey. We had our old standby which is Cornish game hens. I will need to get a new rotisserie motor so that I can do the birds on the barbecue again. It was very nice day even though it was a bit quieter than the previous couple of decades.

I carefully perused all the adds that came in the 5 pound newspaper in preparation of my usual Black Friday shopping excursion. It was a nice day and I hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving.

My usual excursion on the dreaded Black Friday is Sportsman's Warehouse and Ace Hardware. That's it as I would not go within a couple of miles of any mall. Most of the day was spent preparing my list and gathering things for the upcoming elk hunt. No, there will be no guide. I seem to be done with considering using a guide. My first guided event was a disaster (My Elk Hunt Sucked) and the next one was actually pleasant (Big Game Outfitters) but neither produced a shot. My odds seem to be better without "help". We shall see.

I was drawn for a cow hunt just north of Flagstaff in December. I am an experienced cold weather camper and backpacker as I used to do both ages ago in Michigan. I have all the gear including a nice heater for the tent. It is not as much fun to camp by yourself. I was pondering the wisdom of camping by myself in a place that can dump exceptional amounts of snow in a short time. At the of end of my careful considerations that took all of about 30 seconds, I rented a motel room in Flagstaff. One area that I shot an elk is about 15 minutes from the motel and another I would like to go to will take about 35 minutes. I will still take a small tent, sleeping pad, and my good bag in case I get stuck for some reason. Otherwise it will be a hot shower and a regular bed at night.

This reminds me of when I used to go deer hunting with Dad in Mio, Michigan. Dad did not like to camp. I believe the words were, "I saw enough camping in WWII." We would stay in town and drive about 15 minutes in the morning to where we would hunt. There are some good memories of those trips!

New Giant Predator!

Siats meekerorum: New Giant Dinosaur

“This dinosaur was a colossal predator second only to the great Tyrannosaurus rex and perhaps Acrocanthosaurus in the American fossil record,” said Dr Lindsay Zanno from the North Carolina Museum of Natural Sciences and the Field Museum of Natural History, the lead author on the paper published in the journal Nature Communications.

An artist’s reconstruction of Siats meekerorum previously mistakenly identified as Godzilla. Image credit: Ima Lyon.

The Park Service Will Never be Viewed the Same

Report: Armed rangers forced senior-citizen tourists to stay inside their hotel during Yellowstone visit because of shutdown

Grand Canyon Cites People For Entering Closed Park

The National Park Service and its Rangers have been viewed as stewards of the parks and helpful to public. Guess what boys and girls? You have managed to take that reputation and grind into the mud in a very short period of time. Rangers, do you take an oath to the constitution or to be a political toady? Don't bother to try to explain as your actions speak much clearer than noises that will emanate from your mouths. People are already hearing the various excuses that start off with the infamous, "We are only following orders." Good luck with that excuse as it hasn't worked well in the past. You haven't shot anyone yet but, given the enthusiasm with which some of the officer are conducting their "duties", I am now sure that some officers would relish the opportunity.

I can understand (maybe) the need to shut down some sensitive areas like some access to the Petrified Forest but the Grand Canyon. Are you afraid that someone is going to steal the Grand Canyon? You can't hike on a trail that existed before this area was designated as park?

The populace now deems you as untrustworthy. It appears that your oaths were just lies.  The politically driven actions of the Park Service have alienated so many people that your reputation is soiled with no hope of recovery. Some officers are only now worrying that their reputations will be damaged. News flash - it's too late as your reputations are permanently damaged. No one will ever look at you the same way again. It is a shame to see an organization that at one time was so well regarded descend into infamy as yet another armed political overlord organization. It appears that you managed something that I would have bet money was not possible - a lower ranking in public opinion polls than the IRS. Perhaps that is the way you have always been but were just good at hiding it. Sad.

Man Uses Spear

A man saves his girlfriend from cougar attack with a spear.

I like this guy's gumption. This also gives me a thought. Perhaps we should petition AZ Game & Fish to put up a new season. I would call this the Tarzan hunt. Weapons would be limited to a grass rope, knife and spear. These were the weapons used by Tarzan in the earlier books written by Edgar Rice Burroughs in the Tarzan Series. I think that we could call this the Tarzan Tag and no drawing would be required. The tag would be available over-the-counter and with one tag you could hunt any large game species - bear, mountain lion, elk, deer, or javalina during the proper time of year. One animal per tag please.

I envision a new line of products for sale; spears, knives (large), grass ropes, loin cloths, body camo paint, special tree stands designed to give you a boost, and camo mats. The extra boost from the tree stand would be handy when leaping out of tree onto the back of your intended prey. It would give you added range. The camo mats would be padding for that occasional miss to provide for a softer landing. I think more about soft landings as I get older.

They already make camo tarps so you would be all set if your preference is ground concealment as opposed to perching in a tree like a little birdy.

There would be nothing quite like lassoing a bear first thing in the morning!

Tarzan, as presented in the novels, was not the nice caring person presented in the movies and TV shows. He was fairly brutal and had no second thoughts about killing if he deemed it necessary. You might even say that he was an adrenalin junky.

“I do not understand exactly what you mean by fear," said Tarzan. "Like lions, fear is a different thing in different men, but to me the only pleasure in the hunt is the knowledge that the hunted thing has power to harm me as much as I have to harm him. If I went out with a couple of rifles and a gun bearer, and twenty or thirty beaters, to hunt a lion, I should not feel that the lion had much chance, and so the pleasure of the hunt would be lessened in proportion to the increased safety which I felt."

"Then I am to take it that Monsieur Tarzan would prefer to go naked into the jungle, armed only with a jackknife, to kill the king of beasts," laughed the other good naturedly, but with the merest touch of sarcasm in his tone.

"And a piece of rope," added Tarzan.”
― Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes    

Come On, Say What You Really Think

Judge Jeanine speaks up. I had not seen her speak before as I am not a viewer of Fox News. If there was any fence riding here, I missed it.

My Kind of Council Member

"UK city council member reportedly claims to have fathered an alien child"

"Simon Parkes claims he has had experiences with aliens since birth, and his "real mother" is a 9-foot green alien with eight fingers, the Northern Echo reports."

Sadly enough, there was no description of the wife (Cat Queen) or daughter (Zarka). I believe that we have had more than one politician that believed in or thought that they had seen UFOs but the UK gets the best ones. Convince me that the locals don't elect him for the entertainment factor. Reminds me of a song ....

Nine foot two, she's a doll, 
she played college basketball.
Has anybody seen my gal?
Cauliflower ear, guzzles beer,
She can eat most half a steer.
Has anybody seen my gal?
Now if you run into an nine foot two
All covered with hair,
Don't be surprised, it's not your eyes,
Her mother was a grizzly bear.
What the heck, she's a wreck,
She played tackle for Georgia Tech.
Has anybody seen my gal?

We could use a lot more politicians like this one. It would be a refreshing change from the current lot.

There Was a Wedding!!

My Father's Day present was a beautiful wedding. Daughter #2 tied the knot with her Marine. I will post some decent pictures when I get some from the people we hired. The one below is just from my crappy phone. Everything went as planned! It must be a first. Everyone seemed to have a great time and we are tired. The kids are off to Disney for their Honeymoon.

I had written a short speech/toast for just prior to dinner. I started to pretend to roast our daughter and would occasionally glance at my better half.....
"I remember when she was but a tike and was playing in the backyard cactus…. oh, wrong story? How about the time at Big Lake that….not that one either? How about the time with the hamster and the toilet plunger….. OK, OK. I am only kidding, all of the above incidents never happened, as far as you know."

There never was any incident involving a hamster and a toilet plunger, that I know of, but it got a squeal out of the bride and laughter from the rest. People were asking about the hamster for the rest of the evening. She made a beautiful bride!

Send the insects on ahead to take the fight out of them. Fly! Fly! Fly!

I had picked up this comic about February last year. Seems appropriate right about now in more ways than just the single topic of Obamacare.

I am in no way making a statement that Pres. O. actually ordered the IRS to target conservative groups. I believe that it was implicitly understood that it was part of their job descriptions. All those meetings between the IRS and the Pres. were just about golf and stuff. It was purely coincidental. Nothing to see here, move on.

Whew!

I think that I have finally rested up from the Memorial Day weekend. We moved daughter #1 to San Angelo, Texas as she will be attending grad school there. Friday we loaded up her things into the van, trailer and her car. Saturday was a drive across the wastelands of southern New Mexico and West Texas. The wastelands are sparsely interrupted by places selling fireworks, pottery (something to do with the fireworks when bored), novel t-shirts, and other assorted nick-nacks. All these places look about the same and only vary in their state of deterioration. The one on the Continental Divide is special in its dilapidation. I wasn't sure if anyone could walk across the wooden floor without breaking through. I expect that falling through would be bad as it is probably where they raise all the snakes that are put in clear acrylic.

I had rented a U-Haul trailer, one way of course, in order to be able to take all of our darling's valuables. The winds were somewhere between awesome and spectacular. I was not able to drive the single axle trailer over 70 MPH as it would whip around like a leach out of water at any substantial gust of wind. Before you ask - yes, it was balanced correctly. It was almost impossible to read the painted text on the trailer in my rear view mirror with all the wagging back and forth. I think it said something about a 55 MPH limit. I have made this run before in about 10.5 hours. It was more like 12.5 hours this time. We finally arrived safely despite the best efforts of the winds, semis and RVs. My hands and back were already cramped and tired from my death grip on the steering wheel. I think that the van seat has a permanent pucker mark on it.

We went over to the apartment complex Sunday to sign final papers and get the keys to the apartment. This is when we found out that the unit was on the second floor instead of the first floor. There were two different reactions to this news. My daughter says that this is great as she won't have to listen to the elephants upstairs. We have always called the noise generated by people above you as the elephants upstairs. I believe that nomenclature came up when we were staying at a hotel that was also hosting a block of rooms for a soccer tournament. I am getting off topic. My response was more to the tune of, oh crap, now we have to tote all this stuff upstairs. See, two different responses to the same news. Both reasonable responses however mine was not greeted with enthusiasm. I was told to be nice as daughter #1 had to live there and I didn't. Sheeesh! Here I thought that this was a perfect time to complain as I didn't have to live there. She could always apologize for the cranky old man after I left. It might be good to have it known that your father was a cranky old so-and-so to provide for bargaining position in the future.

We successfully unloaded everything. Since I was not totally collapsed in a heap, the trailer was returned and we went to Lowes and bought some more stuff to haul up the stairs. The organizing frenzy was well underway. I was looking for a chair to sit in and pretend that I was immobilized and deaf for a while. It was a good thing that I brought a chair for myself. There is no problem in being immobile as I have a lot of practice in deer hunting. Pretending to be deaf is an acquired skill from years of practice when I am being informed of the chores that remain unfinished.

Monday brought on another shopping spree as we would not want to run out of things to tote up the stairs. Good thing that I got rid of the trailer as some other large items were being considered. I would go out with the measuring tape and return to announce that it wouldn't fit. I guess that you will have to order it and have it delivered. We drove back across the wastelands on Tuesday with winds that were actually spectacular. I was thankful that I didn't have the trailer.

I will now continue to assist in shopping and whatnot until Fathers Day. This is when daughter #2 gets married. She is getting married to a fine young man who is a Marine. I am sure that I will have some fine postings about this glorious event later on. It has been and still is a busy stretch!

 I walked by the reloading bench the other day and was sure that it called out to me. The gun safe definitely called to me and asked why haven't you been shooting? Soon, soon.

The Shoe Tire

My brother and I used to watch the Red Green Show and get some serious laughs. It is a Canadian show that does require some local perspective to understand all of the nuances. We were originally from Michigan and not too far from the border so we were acquainted with many Canadians. Shoot puck, drink beer, eh? The Handyman Corner is one of my favorite segments of the show. Enjoy.



 

College Grad!

Congrats to daughter #1 who has just graduated from NAU in Exercise Science. She has a 4.0 GPA and is an Honors student. Woohoo! Can you say Summa Cum Laude? I knew you could. She gets all this intelligence and sense of humor, of course, from my side of the family. I believe that she gets her goods looks and stubborn streak from her mother.

We will have a two week break and then move her to San Angelo to attend Angelo State University. You know, the good ASU. You may go ahead and complain if you are at/from Arizona State University. The graduate program starts in June for her next goal which is a Doctorate in Physical Therapy. She claims that the DPT stand for "dirt poor technician". I doubt that "poor" part will hold up long as PT's do well.

In all seriousness, congratulations. You worked hard for those grades and deserve them.

She doesn't want much personal information up on websites (smart girl) so here is a picture of a tire print where her car was frozen in place up at Flagstaff. It took a bit of hot water to free the car. You probably won't have that problem in San Angelo, Texas!

Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because .............

Good article by Barry Snell that covers the many deceits of the Gun Control groups. Pop on over and read the many reasons articulated.

"We want the crime and killings to stop as much as you do, so to my fellow citizens who are anti-gun I say: So long as you deny our humanity, so long as you malign our dignity, intelligence and wisdom, so long as you seek to shade us under a cloud of evil that we do not partake in or support, so long as you tell us that because we own guns we are terrible people, you will prove yourselves absolutely right in that we won’t come to the table to talk with you."

Squirrels & Stupidity

It is not the squirrels that are stupid.......
Would-be squirrel-killer injured after taping cartridge to BB gun

Not feeling that the BB gun was powerful enough, he taped a .40 cal round to the end. The round fragmented sending the genius to the hospital. He is also a prohibited person and received a "sworn complaint". The sworn complaint was in lieu of arrest due to his being in the hospital. Otherwise, I expect that he would have been taking a different ride.

I will give this a one Flaming Squirrel rating!

  I think that the earlier post:
Do You Smell Fur Burning, still takes the top prize.