Monday, February 17, 2014

Holy Exploding Methane, Supercow!

Flatulent cows start fire at German dairy farm - police
"One cow was treated for burns, a police spokesman added."

That's is called medium rare in Texas! I guess that this farmer never herd of the udderly fantastic methane collector depicted here. Yes, this is actually a real contraption for the collection of bovine methane. Looks like this one is ready pop and needs to be changed or vented or whatever. How would, Methane Expeller, sound on your resume? Well, back to our story.

We found our ace reporter, Milky (can you say Twin Pines?),

who was on the scene in a mooo-ment and was fortunate enough to get a nice photo of one of the cows out standing in its field. What a blast! The cow was supposedly named Crepitating Clara by the farmer. Paul Boomer and Lord Windesmear also attested to the unusual cow capabilities as they happened to be in the area after performing in one of the international contests, The Battle at Thunderblow, which is sponsored by Trillblow Records. They were both very interested in the cow's diet and seemed unconcerned with the possible flammable side effects.
Milky was able to interview the farmer, Fanny Flatulence, who seemed very excited to meet us.
She keeps the cows on a strict diet of beans and habanero peppers. She claims that it keeps the cows udders warm in the winter for easier milking. "Don't even think about using this milk to quench that spicy food you just ate!" she laughingly exclaimed. The blast is blamed on the replacement of a defective exhaust gas fan with a new unit that was not explosion-proof.

(I must admit that this was lost to the draft file for a while so it is a bit tardy.)